As parents, at times we can be overly cautious … don’t you think? 

As many of you may know, we brought Stella back to emergency about 4 weeks ago when noticed she was having trouble breathing and since all the kids had a nasty cold, we felt it best to get it checked out. Sure enough, they admitted her. She had RSV; a very common virus that babies get which affects their lungs. She was back on oxygen for 12 days to help her breath.  On the second day we ended up getting transferred to Children’s again from RCH because they couldn’t support her breathing with the machines they had on hand; Stella needed something stronger.

I’m pretty sure that day felt like Groundhog Day. I felt all my emotions come up as paramedics rushed around, put an IV in her, strapped her to the stretcher, etc. It was all overwhelming and a blur. Her 2nd ride in an ambulance - this little girl has really taken us on a ride.

While we were riding in the ambulance, I think my brain went into dead mode. If that makes any sense. I didn’t even know where I was until the driver spoke, “Rosanna we will be turning on the lights and sirens and speeding up in a few minutes because we can’t wait in traffic.”

I could see Stella hooked up to a full-face oxygen machine in the rearview mirror, with 3 other paramedics in the back.  All I could think was, ‘how bad is it?’.

Will she stop breathing? What’s happening?

By the way, we were only going 80 kph.  They look like they are going way faster than that when your not in it and I managed to make a joke while we were driving, I said, “Wish my car had this feature”.

Who makes jokes when they are in a stressful situation? Clearly,it’s one of my many coping mechanisms!

Each and every time we end up back in the hospital over night, it takes a great toll on our family. I feel strong when I’m there, but the minute I get home I feel my anxiety and fear take over. It’s definitely an ongoing issue which I am trying to overcome!

YES! We are back home now.

But the other night, she started to sniffle again. I jumped the gun and ended up bringing her to Children’s at 3am! We get there and thank God they weren’t busy, so we were taken right in.

They ask us to undress the baby, etc.  Of course,she’s happy as a clam! Smiling, babbling with the nurses and Doctor. At one point there were 3 nurses that came in just to see how cute she was.

Has this ever happened to you where you have to tell them, “I swear she didn’t sound good and I know she wasn’t feeling good!”

Do you mammas feel like it takes at least the first two months of your baby’s life to start understanding his or her signs? It’s likeany relationship, I guess.  It takes time to really get to know each other.

At least it wasn’t anything serious - just some nasal congestionand we can handle that!  We were back home and in bed by 5am!

These precious moments with Stella have been nothing but an adventure, and as much as it takes a toll on us, she continues to push us to grow as individuals.

I wouldn’t want it any other way!

They didn’t have a small enough costume for Halloween so they dressed her up ♥️😊